This is part one in an ongoing series of reviews looking at freebie games from the good folks at Rising Stuff. Alex, being a kind and gentle soul, decided to send me some free games with my last purchase, games which were given to me with the directive that I had to review them for the blog. Hearing this, I knew I was truly blessed, for Alex was my friend and comrade; whatever he had in store for me had to be something worthy of review, but not just that, it had to be a wonderful, marvelous creation, so good it had to be shared amongst friends. Or, you know, it could just be some junk that Alex knew he’d never be able to sell in the store. It could always be that. When the package arrived, I tore it open, eager to see what untold treasures awaited me. I was, for a brief moment, no longer the cynical, jaded pessimist that adulthood had turned me into. I was transported back to a wondrous time of my childhood where everything was fresh and new and exciting. I was a kid at Christmas, unwrapping a delightful present. Then reality sunk in, and I became the jaded pessimist once more. This present from Alex was worse than Grandma’s package of socks! In fact, the only present I could think of that was on par with this was the one our dog Koy liked to leave in the yard! However, a promise was a promise, and I’m determined to review these so-called games. So hit the jump if you’re the kinda person to watch Hostel with one hand on the pause button and one in the pants, ’cause these games are the worst kind of torture imaginable.

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